It Hurts
by Michael J. O'Malley
Summary: Partial Reincarnation AU- Four times Eren is hurting and just can't get a break, and the one time he gets one. Ereri. My first SnK fanfiction. Tell me what you think.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Shingeki no Kyojin.**

 **-SnK—SnK—SnK-**

 _Red. Red everywhere. Covering the ground. Staining the grass. Soaked into his clothes. Splattered on the bodies of those he held dearest. And it was all because of him. Blood stained his hands, dripped from his hair, and fell from his blades in streams. It was all his fault._

 _Even when he wasn't in his Titan form, he was still a monster, a threat to everyone. A threat to Mikasa, Armin, Connie, Sasha, Hanji . . . even Levi. All of their bodies lay bloody, bruised and mangled on the ground._

' _A monster,' he thought to himself. 'I'm a monster.' And then he screamed. He screamed to the heavens with tears rolling down his face and pain searing his heart and soul until it was all he could feel._

 _A monster was what he was. There was a flash of agony._

 _A monster and a threat to everyone. Pain seared through him to the bone._

Eren jolted awake, sweat and tears clinging to his skin and drenching the sheets beneath him. He could almost imagine that the sticky liquid was blood, and that it was covering his entire body, like in his dream. He felt a ghost of the pain that plagued him in his nightmares, and he whimpered pathetically.

"It hurts," he whispered to the darkness of the cellar.

 **-SnK—SnK—SnK-**

He had the same nightmare two days later, except this time, his corporal was there to wake him up. Despite the cold, hard exterior he always had, he was a gentle lover, if not abrasive at times. Levi kissed the tears away, comforted him, took the shifter to his rooms to shower and get proper sleep.

And still, he couldn't help but think, _'It hurts,'_ as the raven haired man held him close and told him that there was no way he was a monster.

- **SnK—SnK—SnK-**

Eren ran across the battlefield of the last battle mankind would have to face against the Titans, looking for the one person he _needed_ to know was okay. He scanned the faces of the wounded on the ground that were being tended to, of the people tending to the wounded or looking for loved ones, even scanned the faces of the dead.

And then he finally found his corporal lying in a pool of his own blood, his right leg missing and blood still spilling out of his numerous wounds. Eren quickly dropped to his knees beside the half conscious man and cradled him in his arms.

"L-Levi," Eren stuttered, tears of denial forming in his eyes. "L-Levi, look at me. T-tell me you're o-okay. _Please!_ " Beautiful silver eyes flickered to Eren's blue-green ones, dulling by the second.

"S-stupid, s-shitty brat," he rasped. "O-of course I'm f-fine." The man gave a small, rare smile, as if to comfort his crying lover. Tears dripped down Eren's face. He could see Levi's life slipping away quickly.

"No! You can't leave me!" he shouted between sobs. "I love you!" And silver eyes widened in some of their last moments of awareness, because, despite how much they'd been through together, neither of them had said those three, binding words. "Don't leave!" Eren cried.

A pale, shaky hand cupped Eren's wet cheek. "My s-shitty b-brat . . ." And then his hand slipped from the shifter's cheek. Eren caught it quickly, holding it tightly, as if it would keep the shorted man alive. His eyes slipped shut, and his breath stopped.

"No!" He screamed, grief and denial surging through him. "Come one, Levi! Wake up! Wake up, goddammit! _Don't leave me!"_ His screams of agony echoed around the battlefield eerily, one of the only sounds that could be heard in the silent plain. " _ **Wake the fuck up already! Please! I love you, you asshole!"**_

Slowly, the screams became whispers, and gentle hands pried him away from his lover's sleeping (dead) form. A choked whimper escaped him. "It hurts," he whispered.

 **-SnK—SnK—SnK-**

Only a week after the death of Corporal Levi Ackerman, Eren Jaeger committed suicide using one of the guns his lover had owned, leaving a short note for his friends. His last words were, "It hurts."

 **-SnK—SnK—SnK-**

Eren stepped out of his apartment complex, ready for his morning jog and thinking about the memories he'd been forced to remember the night in his dreams. It took all he had to force himself out of bed that morning. He slipped his earbuds into place and blasted his music, looking to drown out the memories that wouldn't stop playing over and over in his head.

Eren had only jogged a couple of blocks down the street when he noticed a moving truck at a house across the street. That wasn't what had caught his eye, though. It was the short, raven haired man that was taking a box out of the van that got his attention.

Eren froze in his tracks. The only thing he could think to do was stand there, frozen, and stare at the man that he'd killed himself over. It wasn't long before the man had noticed him, as well. Silver eyes widened in shock at the sight, and the box he'd been carrying fell from his arms. And suddenly he was tackled by his green-eyed beauty in a suffocating hug.

Levi could feel tears staining his black button down, but somehow, he couldn't bring himself to care in that moment. Eren gave a wet, breathy laugh, and whispered, "My corporal," at the same time as Levi said, "My shitty brat."

Levi pulled back and crushed his lips to Eren's, and only when the both of them ran out of breath did they pull apart. "I love you, too, you brat," Levi said softly.

Eren grinned brightly, smiling for the first time since he remembered his past life. "It doesn't hurt anymore," Eren told him, tears dripping down his face.

 _ **Fin**_

 **-SnK—SnK—SnK-**

 **Thanks so much for reading! If you guys want a continuation of this or something, please let me know in the reviews, or just tell me what you thought about it ^_^**

 **Favorite, follow, review, and PM me! Until next time . . .**

 **~O'Malley out!**


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